DAY 95 Last night I couldn’t sleep. I didn’t manage to put my leg, my feet, my ankle comfortable. It was painful, no matter how I laid it down. I moved a lot, as did the pillows, sheets, quilt. Maybe it was an abreaction on all the action yesterday; after my beach adventure I kept on walking in the house. And I cooked, so I stood in the kitchen for quite a while.
At one o’clock in the night one of my cats started mewing at the other side of my door. Maybe she was hearing my other cat, who was still outside, so I got out of bed, walked down all the stairs, let the cat in and went up all the stairs straight into my bed. I slept, but woke up many times.
When I get up I can’t find any crutch in my bedroom, which means that after walking all the stairs down and up without the crutches, I have not cared about taking the one I left at the stairs to my bedroom. Haha!That’s a good sign. Although in the morning I need the crutches the most, there is no crutch near the bed, so … I do without.
“Loose your mind and create a new one.”
After breakfast I meditate on the balcony for more than two hours, inspired by Joe Dispenza, who wrote books like: ‘Evolve your brain The Science of Changing Your Mind’, ‘You are the placebo’ and ‘Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself’.
It’s warm and I’m so done with knotting my feet tight into the high black leather shoes, so I try to walk barefoot today, varied with sitting with the leg high on the table. Walking barefoot inspires me to try something else and I go on a shoe hunt again. I’ve tried before two weeks ago, but nothing fitted.
Now it’s warmer, so other kinds of shoes get a chance and I find my good-old-Greek-sandals, very light, very simple and they fit! These are like the oldest, maybe even the first shoes designed for human beings and they still work the best for me. Almost ready for dancing . . . And that is another milestone!
To be continued … (Part of my 100 days of healing tour)
© Jeannette van Uffelen